Friday, June 14, 2013

Sex Toys

I got some Lelo beads yesterday after reading this post on r/sex where some lady described being able to lift 2 pound weights with her vagina. While that's not my goal, I still wanted to see what it was all about. I wore the pink ones in the harness yesterday while out walking (maybe about an hour total). I'm not sure if this is typical, but by the end of the day I felt like I had period cramps. Which, I'm not due for another week, so it's a bit early. Unsure if maybe it was just my pelvic muscles being sore in a similar way to when you work other muscles in your body?

Long story short, they seem pretty awesome and I'll keep everyone posted with longer term findings.

Then today while browsing ye ol' Fetlife, a sidebar ad popped up for Fifty Shades of Grey exclusive sex toy collection. Which, before everyone picks up their pitchforks, yes, I've read it. Well, I read the first one. Spoiler alerts - they break up at the end of the first one. That was good enough for me, so I quit. Also, I'll spare everybody the likely hundreds of pages rant that I could go on about this Fifty Shades sex toy collection.

I'll just outline the stupidest part of it: the game.

Players take turns to read a vanilla style question out loud, before all players must secretly vote on which (of the eight predetermined friends they selected before starting the game) they believe is best matched to the question: questions like, "which of your girlfriends do you think would be most likely to have an affair with their boss? Name the girlfriend you think is the most romantic?" or "Which girlfriend is most likely to Tweet about a steamy encounter?" When all players have chosen a friend they take turns to reveal their answers for all to see. Once all the giggles, laughter, 'Oohs' and 'Ahhs' have died down, any player that picked the same friend as the reader wins an Inner Goddess token.

There's also an expansion pack if you want to get really naughty about things.

I swear if I am ever at a party and somebody busts this game out I will literally flip the table over.

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