Monday, March 5, 2012


I've recently decided to start being more honest with people at work. No, this does not mean that when they ask how my weekend went I am saying things like, "awesome! I went to a gang bang on Saturday." It means more that I am finding a happy medium between that and just saying I didn't do much. I will save you all the extremely metaphysical discussions I've been having recently about "authentic self" and just give you the tl;dr version. Things I am doing outside of work are making me excessively happy, and then having to lie by omission about them while at work is sort of making me not as happy, and I have decided that I like being happy more than I like worrying about what people are going to think about me.

All that being said, I've started telling people at work when I spend time with "my other boyfriends." (For any of them that are actually reading this, yes, I know that's a bit more committed than we actually are. Don't worry. I'm not pushing for that terminology. It just happens to be a term I've found that makes straight people's forehead's wrinkle less than things like "fuck buddy" or "friends with benefits" or "guy I occasionally date/have sex with." And since I am also a fan of brevity, I go with what words are already there.)

For example, if I'm sending texts with one of said other boyfriends and somebody asks me what I'm smiling about, I'll say, "oh, just one of my other boyfriends saying something funny." It's a momentary pause where they try to figure out whether I'm being serious or facetious (it's honestly a fine line sometimes with me, I can be quite the smart-ass), but then usually there are no follow-up questions, no awkward "but you're also married! That can't be possible" type discussions. Just, "oh, you have other boyfriends" and then move on. I don't know if it's just the place I work - maybe I'm extremely lucky. Or maybe it's just because I've stopped the bullshit "oh, ermmm...yeah, it's this other guy...uh...I don't know how to explain this" crap and just admitted to myself what it is and am more comfortable talking about it. "I spent time this weekend with one of my other boyfriends. It was awesome." Enough said.

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