Wednesday, January 6, 2016

The one where I'm on Season 3 of Six Feet Under

It's always been on my list of "someday I'll get around to actually watching this," and I've been gradually making my way through episodes. Over Winter Break I worked my way through Season 2, which means tonight I was on Season 3, Episode 2. "You Never Know." Alternatively titled "Nah, You Always Know Straight People are Terrible."

Overall, I'm liking the series. Not knock-my-socks-off, but enjoyable. It's got plenty of really good moments and subtle commentary about various aspects of the human condition. Season 3, Episode 2 is a fucking deluge of not-so-subtle commentary about how much straight couples are Terrible.

Nate and Lisa. Oh, lord, Nate and Lisa. Where does one even begin with this episode?

Let's start with the chaste, spooning-style, under the covers banging that they have to stop because their baby is in the same room as them. The baby that up until now they've let sleep family-style with them. Because apparently feeding your infant a spoonful of peanut butter could possibly kill them but putting a very small, soft baby into a bed between two adults will definitely never mean that one of those adults will roll over in their sleep and crush said soft, small baby.

(Spoilers: later in the episode you see that they still sleep family-style, so I guess baby Maya is just relegated to her crib when Mommy and Daddy want to have the type of sex they can maintain a coherent conversation during. Also, yeah, I just used an image from the show in an entry about the show.)

Let's continue with how Nate is all, "omg, hello?" when he opens the door for dinner and his brother David is kissing his partner Keith. Guh-ross! Only monogamous, straight couples are allowed to show any type of affection. And now that Nate isn't with that slut Brenda, he can go back to having the type of really meaningful sex that only people in twu wuv can have. You know, the type that's completely under the covers, but it's early morning or some shit so the two of them can bask equally in the sun's glow as they're basking in how much better their relationship is than anybody else's. (Brenda was probably a sex addict anyway? I mean, she did pack that book about sex addiction in with her stuff when she decided to abruptly leave town after Nate said he didn't want her around anymore.)

Exhibit 3. The conversation during dinner about how Lisa is so sad for David and Keith because they have to be in couple's counseling. Lisa and Nate never fight. Oh wait, except for that time earlier in the day when Lisa was cleaning the baby's ears and Nate got all butt hurt about how she was going to deep (no complaints about that during the humping, Nate a-yooooo) and was going to hurt the baby. Oh, or that time right after dinner I mean just after she was all, "my relationship is perfect we never fight" when her and Nate get in an argument about what damn laundry detergent he used to was the clothes. Because one brand gives the baby a rash! I'm with you on this one, Nate. Why the fuck do you even have the other brand around the house then?

Also, not a complaint about Nate and Lisa, but goddamnit Claire and guitar playing fuck boy (I forget his actual name whatever he plays in a band and has a gigantic tattoo that dick is probably pretty good) you almost could have done the open relationship thing. Or at least had the conversation. Why'd it have to be all him: "yeah I just want to fuck other people wild oats, etc" vs.  her: "I thought we were in love?!!" Ugh! Straight People.

In superbly good news, this episode featured Kathy Bates.

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