Monday, April 28, 2014

Stick 'em with the pointy end

Because who doesn't like a Game of Thrones reference for an entry that's really going to be all about dicks?

Ah, Renly. I know your house sigil is the stag, but seriously you might as well be wearing one of those bachelorette crowns that has little pastel penises on it.

So, yes. Actual topic.

I went to a rather pleasant play party this past Saturday. Hosted by podcast guy and involving 17 or so other very sexy people. I got an opportunity at the party to have sex with a gentleman I've been crushing on since meeting him at a UFC get-together thing I went to with podcast guy. Aforementioned gentleman turned out to have a dick that literally bent back up to his belly button. Of all the dicks I've encountered in my travels, this is the first one I've seen with that particular bend. It was...incredible. Especially when I was on top.

I bring this up because of course I don't want to just tell you what a fantastically sexy evening I had riding a new cute guy, but also because I want to discuss theory!

I've also recently finished What Women Want by David Bergner. In which "parental investment theory" gets brought up briefly. tl;dr on parental investment theory: women hold out sex because it takes a lot of work to raise babies, and they want to make sure they've got a mate who will stay with them through that process before they're willing to "invest" in a sexual relationship. Conversely, men want to pass on their genes and so are looking for any and every available vagina in which to pump their seed. Bergner's not a fan of the theory, and presents some really good "correlation not equaling causation" information to dispute it. The rest of the book is also fairly interesting, if you're looking for something to read.

Parental investment theory got me thinking about all the speculation behind why the human male's penis is shaped the way it is. (There's bits about this in Sex at Dawn, also in the aptly named Why Is The Penis Shaped Like That?) tl;dr on dick shape: human males evolved this "plunger" shaped dick because, if the woman the guy's having sex with has also previously had sex with some other dude, the shape of the penis will help "plunge" the other dude's sperm out of the vagina. Thus, second dude's sperm gets a better chance at finding the egg. Bada-bing, bada-boom, better chance of passing on those genes, second dude.

They're not entirely related, but they belong together under the umbrella that is sexuality research. This is why I love reading about and learning about sex. Parental investment theory falls apart if you consider things like the availability of birth control. The whole penis shaped thing is fascinating, because it seems like an almost freak evolutionary adaptation that somehow's worked out for humans. Bergner's got some really interesting ideas about how the great majority of sex studies are inherently flawed because they take place in clinical research settings, and not in naturally occurring circumstances. Also that human beings are the only species able to completely misinterpret and misrepresent their own libidos, so even questionnaire based studies are highly suspect.

At the end of the day, having sex is pretty awesome. Learning lots about sex? Also very awesome. Keep it real, nerds.

1 comment:

  1. Two new characters in this blog? This is turning into Grey's Anatomy so quickly. I kid, I kid. <3